i feel like i'm going crazy. many things could set the mind off track, this is how people slowly loose control, lose their mind, their thoughts aren't theirs anymore. there are many perceptions of the brain, what one might see another might not, what one finds beautiful could be ugly to his companion. You say tomatoe I say toe mato. You can trick your mind into beleiveing something. It could be the most insane thing but if you tell yourself it long enough it will soon apear true. you can over look things, over think things, insist upon thingss. The brain is trained. Brainwash. You can brainwash yourself or others can do the job for you. We are all a slave to ourselves as well as everyone else. Your mind is not your own.
You may ask what is this nonsesnse coming out of my mind, am I off on another rant? No... Tonight, Nov. 1 2010, 4:15 am. I nearly questioned my sanity. I fear I am losing sense of reality, brainwashing myself. For years I have appeared to be the bad one in my family, my sister the princess. I have fought these alligations completely oblivious to how this was true, but was it? Or is that my own sick twisted view of it? My nearly ending relationship, I bitch bitch bitch nightly about what HE needs to change, but does he really? His sister, his best friend, noone seems to see this side but me, or am I forcing myself to beleive it's all his fault when blindly it's me? Do I appear to others as I appear to myself? Or am I the complete opposite? Is any of this real? Or are our dreams the reality. What are we? Masses of solid space on a tilting globe? What the fuck is gravity? What is oxygen that keeps us breathing? How did any of this exsist? I'm losing it. Losing touch with everything and I'm fucking terrified.
Somebody pull me in.
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